Not Me Monday

I saw this last week and decided today is the perfect day to try it out. Visit My Charming Kids for more details! So...without further ado..

We DID NOT get back to Florida at 12:30am this morning. The Irishman and I DID NOT swear off the midnight flight after last year. We DID NOT change our mind this year because it saved us $100. It was NOT US in line for the shared ride taxi that had to stop off at my place of employment before taking us home. I DID NOT get drenched by the automatic sprinklers as I tried to pry the mail from the over stuffed mailbox. (After all, I DID NOT forget to put a hold on the mail or have a neighbor collect the mail!)

I DID NOT insist on unpacking the suitcases when we finally got home at 2am. I DID NOT have to get up at 5:45 this morning. Of course it was NOT ME giving the Irishman dirty looks as he made international phone calls this morning as I was trying to get ready for school. It was NOT ME that chose an outfit this morning based on what would not require shaving of the legs or painting of the toenails.

I DID NOT forget my umbrella in school. It was NOT ME who ran to the car in the rain. It was definitely NOT ME who dumped her husband out in the middle of the street in the rain with just a lightweight jacket to protect him from the elements. I DID NOT apologize to him as I did so rambling about the fact that it was 7:26 and I had 7:30 morning duty.

I DID NOT walk into the building this morning to hear myself being paged for morning duty. I DID NOT have to stand in the rain with the school administrator who had me paged for 25 23 minutes this morning opening car doors for Kindergartners.

I DID NOT hold a class meeting this morning to inform my class that I had only 3 and a half hours of sleep and was feeling cranky. I MOST CERTAINLY DID NOTturn my lack of sleep into an impromptu lesson on elapsed time.

It was NOT ME who decided to put up Christmas decorations in my classroom after school instead of grading multiplication tests.

I WAS NOT secretly thrilled when my husband decided to cook dinner tonight.

It was NOT ME who packed a $28 vacuum covered in bubble wrap in her suitcase yesterday. I DID NOT decide to test the vacuum out tonight while the Irishman made Cyber Monday gift purchases instead of going to sleep early.

It is NOT ME who has decided to stay up WAY TOO late to finish this post...

You must have me mixed up with someone else!